It’s been radio silence here the last few weeks, and for that I apologise. I hope Christmas and New Year rested you all well and 2017 has been great so far.
I’m going to be honest here and say that things in our house suck pretty bad at the moment. Of course I’m always grateful that we have a roof over our heads, food in our bellies etc, but this is one of those times when things suck. There’s depression, new meds, an issue with my bank account and my workplace being less than helpful. As single things they’re not a big deal, but all together they’re like navigating a dark path in the woods where you keep getting scratched by tree branches, falling over and screaming “fuck!” every so often.
Things have sucked in the past, but then when you throw in the added stress of trying to be “Supermum”, it’s harder. Trying to keep up with people’s pretty, Instagram-ready, perfectly pristine lives is HARD! Especially in the blogger world where it is further magnified with matching outfits, glamourous mum and baby shoots and picture perfect family moments captured for the world to see (#blessed #bestkidsever #gotittogether). On a bad day, Supermum can send me into a fit of dispair. Is Eden missing out on something by not doing sparkly jelly crafts or making homemade cookies? And what exactly is a chia seed?
I’ve been reading “The Unmumsy Mum”, the book based on the fantastic blog by the same name, and one piece stuck out to me today. I was reading on the tube on the way back from a meeting. I was without the baby and actually able to just read for the (short) journey.
I found this wisdom in the book;
“Despite having spent many months of parenthood being jealous of Supermum, I’ve come to realise it’s a bit like being jealous of Barbie and her unattainable hip/waist/bust ratio. Supermum can take a flying fuck at a rolling chia-seed muffin for all I care, because Supermum is not real.”
And BOY did that strike a chord with me!
I realised that we all choose what we show the world. People share the moments what they want to remember. The smiles, the giggles and the blustery walks in perfect autumn woods. We share the beautiful outfits BEFORE they get covered in sick or mud. We share the toddler smiles AFTER naptime and not before, when she’s cranky. I guess when we create memories we want to remember the good. We want to tell the world about the good and leave out the slightly harsher, not so fun parts. Doesn’t mean the bad bits don’t happen.
So, with that in mind I’m declaring (Along with Unmumsy!) that “Supermum isn’t real”. She’s not real, so we should quit trying to be her. This fictional character was brought to us by social media and is as real as FarmVille or sodding Candy Crush. So, forget about her. Forget about Supermum and her shiny, Pinterest inspired life which we all know isn’t actually like that.
Take the whole of the fairytale – ogres and all – and be your best mum. Because that’s all your kids want and boy is it easier on the brain that way!
(I’m on a short break from blogging, but I promise I will be back soon. I’m concentrating on keeping well at the moment. If you’re a company who has sent me a product to review, apologies for the delay. The only way is up, right? Be back soon!)